--- fortune-mod-1.99.1.orig/datfiles/art +++ fortune-mod-1.99.1/datfiles/art @@ -7,13 +7,14 @@ Mann Act with an interstate Greyhound bus. % A "critic" is a man who creates nothing and thereby feels qualified to -judge the work of creative men. There is logic in this; he is unbiased +judge the work of creative men. There is logic in this; he is unbiased -- he hates all creative people equally. + -- Robert Heinlein % A celebrity is a person who is known for his well-knownness. % A circus foreman was making the rounds inspecting the big top -when a scrawny little man entered the tent and walked up to him. "Are +when a scrawny little man entered the tent and walked up to him. "Are you the foreman around here?" he asked timidly. "I'd like to join your circus; I have what I think is a pretty good act." The foreman nodded assent, whereupon the little man hurried over to @@ -100,7 +101,7 @@ -- William Faulkner % A yawn is a silent shout. - -- G.K. Chesterton + -- G. K. Chesterton % A young man wrote to Mozart and said: @@ -220,8 +221,9 @@ Authors are easy to get on with -- if you're fond of children. -- Michael Joseph, "Observer" % -Bahdges? We don't need no stinkin' bahdges! - -- "The Treasure of Sierra Madre" +Badges? We ain't got no badges! We don't need no badges. I don't have +to show you any stinkin' badges! + -- "The Treasure of the Sierra Madre" % Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work. @@ -530,7 +532,7 @@ -- Fred Allen % I didn't do it! Nobody saw me do it! Can't prove anything! - -- Bart Simpson + -- Bart Simpson % I didn't like the play, but I saw it under adverse conditions. The curtain was up. @@ -656,7 +658,7 @@ % I WISH I HAD A KRYPTONITE CROSS, because then you could keep both Dracula and Superman away. - -- Jack Handley, The New Mexican, 1988. + -- Jack Handey, The New Mexican, 1988. % I wish there was a knob on the TV to turn up the intelligence. There's a knob called "brightness", but it doesn't seem to work. @@ -775,7 +777,7 @@ -- Lionel Trilling % Immature poets imitate, mature poets steal. - -- T.S. Eliot, "Philip Massinger" + -- T. S. Eliot, "Philip Massinger" % In Hollywood, all marriages are happy. It's trying to live together afterwards that causes the problems. @@ -824,15 +826,15 @@ -- Rod Serling % It is something to be able to paint a particular picture, or to carve a -statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious -to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, +statue, and so to make a few objects beautiful; but it is far more glorious +to carve and paint the very atmosphere and medium through which we look, which morally we can do. To affect the quality of the day, that is the highest of arts. Every man is tasked to make his life, even in its details, worthy of the contemplation of his most elevated and critical hour. -- Henry David Thoreau, "Where I Live" % It is up to us to produce better-quality movies. - -- Lloyd Kaufman, producer of "Stuff Stephanie in the Incinerator" + -- Lloyd Kaufman, producer of "Stuff Stephanie in the Incinerator" % It just doesn't seem right to go over the river and through the woods to Grandmother's condo. @@ -981,7 +983,7 @@ -- Dave Barry % Lay off the muses, it's a very tough dollar. - -- S.J. Perelman + -- S. J. Perelman % Lensmen eat Jedi for breakfast. % @@ -1119,7 +1121,7 @@ -- Dave Barry, "The Snake" % "My life is a soap opera, but who has the rights?" - -- MadameX + -- MadameX % My tears stuck in their little ducts, refusing to be jerked. -- Peter Stack, movie review @@ -1139,7 +1141,7 @@ No poet or novelist wishes he was the only one who ever lived, but most of them wish they were the only one alive, and quite a number fondly believe their wish has been granted. - -- W.H. Auden, "The Dyer's Hand" + -- W. H. Auden, "The Dyer's Hand" % No two persons ever read the same book. -- Edmund Wilson @@ -1216,7 +1218,7 @@ Plots are like girdles. Hidden, they hold your interest; revealed, they're of no interest except to fetishists. Like girdles, they attempt to contain an uncontainable experience. - -- R.S. Knapp + -- R. S. Knapp % Potahto' Pictures Productions Presents: @@ -1401,7 +1403,7 @@ -- Robert Carson % Television has brought back murder into the home -- where it belongs. - -- Alfred Hitchcock + -- Alfred Hitchcock % Television has proved that people will look at anything rather than each other. -- Ann Landers @@ -1461,7 +1463,7 @@ -- Book review by Ambrose Bierce. % The difference between waltzes and disco is mostly one of volume. - -- T.K. + -- T. K. % The faster we go, the rounder we get. -- The Grateful Dead @@ -1603,7 +1605,7 @@ NOW -- McCLANAHAN!!! -- The Rotten Apple (1963), Rue McClanahan -*NOT FOR SISSIES! DON'T COME IF YOU'RE CHICKEN! +*NOT FOR SISSIES! DON'T COME IF YOU'RE CHICKEN! A Horrifying Movie of Wierd Beauties and Shocking Monsters... 1001 WIERDEST SCENES EVER!! MOST SHOCKING THRILLER OF THE CENTURY! -- Teenage Psycho meets Bloody Mary (1964) (Alternate Title: @@ -1703,7 +1705,7 @@ horror on a screaming world! -- The Crawling Eye (1958) -SEE a female colossus... her mountainous torso, scyscraper limbs, +SEE a female colossus... her mountainous torso, skyscraper limbs, giant desires! -- Attack of the Fifty-Foot Woman (1958) @@ -1902,7 +1904,7 @@ % There's nothing remarkable about it. All one has to do is hit the right keys at the right time and the instrument plays itself. - -- J.S. Bach + -- J. S. Bach % There's nothing to writing. All you do is sit at a typewriter and open a vein. -- Red Smith @@ -1975,7 +1977,7 @@ Today you'll start getting heavy metal radio on your dentures. % Today's thrilling story has been brought to you by Mushies, the great new -cereal that gets soggy even without milk or cream. Join us soon for more +cereal that gets soggy even without milk or cream. Join us soon for more spectacular adventure starring... Tippy, the Wonder Dog! -- Bob & Ray % @@ -2178,7 +2180,7 @@ -- Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart, from a letter to his cousin Maria, "The Definitive Biography of PDQ Bach", Peter Schickele % -Why you say you no bunny rabbit when you have little powder-puff tail? +Why you say you no bunny rabbit when you have little powder-puff tail? -- The Tasmanian Devil % Working with Julie Andrews is like getting hit over the head with a valentine. @@ -2237,8 +2239,31 @@ Zero Mostel: That's it baby! When you got it, flaunt it! Flaunt it! -- Mel Brooks, "The Producers" % -Naked children have never played in _o_u_r fountains, and I.M. Pei will +Naked children have never played in _our_ fountains, and I.M. Pei will never be happy on Route 66. -- "Learning from Las Vegas", Robert Venturi, Denise Scott Brown, and Steven Izenour % +Sometimes I get the feeling that there are orgies going on all over New +York City, and somebody says, "Let's call Desmond," and somebody else says, +"Why bother? He's probably home reading the Encyclopedia Britannica." + -- Paul Desmond, jazz saxophonist +% +Usually, in the studio, on this sort of thing ... you just go out and have +a play over it, and see what comes, and it's usually -- mostly -- the first +take that's the best one, and you find yourself repeating yourself thereafter. + -- David Gilmour, on the famous guitar solo in "Time" +% +Rap music is just computerised crap. I listen to Top of the Pops and after +three songs I feel like killing someone. + -- George Harrison +% +I'm not sure how much writing happened. You know, let's play E minor and A for +an hour or two. Oh, that sounds all right, that'll take up five minutes. + -- Roger Waters, on the composition of "Breathe" +% +"Hiro has two loves, baseball and porn, but due to an elbow injury he +gives up baseball...." + -- AniDB description of _H2_, with selective quoting applied. + http://anidb.info/perl-bin/animedb.pl?show=anime&aid=352 +%